The Legend of Pygman

He forged Pygman an unbreakable sword and shield. Pygman thanked him and was on his way, the whole time wondering, "What is Aphrodite doing with a freak like that?"

Pygman traveled on his way to the great city of Hartford. While on his way he encountered a band of heroes doing battle with the infamous Thydra at the base of a cliff.

As you remember it was a beast with twenty razor sharp

tails and teeth on its one head the size of an oak tree.

One man tried to slice off a tail but it cut his sword in two! Another man was sliced by the Thydra's tail. One hero tried to cut off the beast's head but was pinned to the ground by two of the tails and eaten. After seeing that the heroes were going to lose the battle resoundingly, Pygman decided to help them out. He climbed a nearby tree and leapt onto the Thydra's back. Using his sword forged by Hephaestus he sliced one the tails off in one clean swipe. The tail fell on the ground and suddenly grew into another Thydra! All the other heroes ran away. Pygman, being cornered, spied a long pointed tree lying dead on top of the cliff above him. He let the Thydrae charge at him and at the last minute ducked under a rock. The Thydrae blitzed him and slammed into the cliff ending up on top of each other. This jarred the tree off the cliff and it fell down running through both the monsters and killing them so that they died and ceased to live. R.I.P.

After the battle was over the remaining heroes came out of hiding. The first came to thank Pygman and said, "Thank you good hero, what is your name?"

"I am Pygman."

Trying to hide a smirk the hero said "Well, Pig-man...."

"It's Pygman."

"Right, sorry my arm got bitten off earlier today and I haven't been the same since."

"Your arm?" Asked Pygman.

"It, uh, grew back. My name is Hurculees."

"The Hercules?"

He looked down, "No, Hurculees. Two E's at the end. The other men were starting to come up. "And this is Jayson, with a Y, Achillese with an E at the end, and Perseus."

"What? Perseus with a silent q and two P's?" Asked Pygman sarcastically.

Purseus piped in, "No, its spelled Purseus."

"So you are THE Purseus who killed Medusa."

Purseus also looked at the ground, "Well, no. But I did meet her in a bar once and almost completely drank her under the table. I also auditioned for ' Clash of the Titans'."

Hurculees interrupted, "Pygman, we can see that you are braver than us so we will join you on your quest."

Not knowing how to take this Pygman responded with, "k." The gods had not given him the skill of eloquent speech.

Pygman and his men continued on the road to the city of Hartford.

At this time king Analus was in the process of forcing the king of Athens to send him seven young maidens to do the chicken dance to appease the Thydra. The king of Athens had to comply because other kings were always picking on him. Analus's trusted soothsayer came in with some rather unpleasant news.

"Thire?" Asked the Soothsayer, whose name happened to be Jim.

"What is it Jim?" responded the king.

"Uh, well thire, the Thydwas have been kiwled."

"What!" "Why couldn't these magic guys ever be normal?" he wondered. Jim was overweight, pale, had a goatee, he always insisted on greeting people with 'Live long and prosper', and had an obvious speech problem.

"Yeth, I've just theen it in the Orwacle pool." The Oracle pool was a remarkable device.