Fairy Bunking Chapter 2: Tea on a Leaf

"I wasn't talking about our conversation," Alacrity said evenly. She rubbed her shoulder and looked for any signs of a wound. "Are you making any progress Scarcity?" she asked, her voice thick with sarcastic sincerity. "See," she nodded from Claptrap to Scarcity, "I'm being nice."

"I'm trying," Scarcity replied, frustrated. She put the clip back in and tried pounding on the bolt with her hand, then let out a sharp yelp as the rifle fired. The discharge seared several holes through the leaf just under Alacrity's legs.

"Watch it!" Alacrity shouted.

"I'm sorry!" Scarcity cried, "at least it's working."

"Good, then can you cover me while I put something on my shoulder?"

"Oh, no," she said immediately thereafter.

"Let me guess, another jam," Alacrity grumbled and moved to a less perforated location on the leaf.

"Yes," she pouted. "I don't know why."

"Oh dear," Claptrap stammered, looking at Alacrity. "You're hurt?"

"No more than I was when I got here," came her crass reply.

"I'll mix something together for you then," and she began to finish her sewing project. "You know, all of this could easily have been avoided."

Alacrity rolled her eyes and tried to listen for enemy activity. Hopefully they weren't advancing. "We can't just run away," she said, appalled at the thought.

"I'm sure this game of yours and Ubermensch's is really lovely, but it's starting to become somewhat of a bore."

"What game?" she asked, grinding the words out with an amply irritated tone.

"It's so obvious that you're pining for him. You want him to show up and fix Scarcity's thingy-mahoo, or better yet, get comfortable next to you up on the leaf so you can make 'pow-pow' noises at the scampering forest critters." She tied off her threads and put her needles away, then pulled out a small tea pot and a pouch of tea. "Now," she judged Alacrity's expression, "I think what would really help you is a nice cup of tea."

Alacrity gaped and felt angered, though, speechless, thinking of her recent outing with Ubermensch. Eventually, she just said, "I never mentioned Ubermensch."

"You don't have to mention him. I've seen how the two of you behave. You've been acting like this for the last five years." Claptrap's expression became serious, "Before that, you played out some long courting affair, and at least ten years passed between kiss and consummation."

"This is different," Alacrity argued. "Times are different. We're in a war."

"You and Ubermensch are playing at being squabbling lovers then, is that it?" Claptrap asked, now shaking some tealeaves into her small pot. "A bit too human-like for my taste."

"We're all at war, Claptrap. Why do you think we have rifles, and armor, and are spending our afternoon on this leaf doing battle with the enemy?" she asked exasperatedly.

"I think it's working," Scarcity said, holding up her rifle.

Alacrity ducked, eyeing Scarcity with due caution. "Do you mind taking a watch?"

Scarcity nodded, now in a much better mood, as her rifle seemed to be working. "What do I shoot at?"

"The enemy." Alacrity slid along the curve of the leaf to Scarcity's side. "You'll see them in the direction of the lake, unless they've moved."

"Now," she met Scarcity's gawking expression with a stern look. "If you see a twinkle, duck. That's the enemy shooting at you."

She became quite nervous, and then pointed upwards, clutching the rifle to her chest. "There was a twinkle. I'm certain they're up there."

Alacrity shook here head. "No, they are most certainly in the direction of the lake."

"What about tea?" Claptrap asked. "I think both of you should have your tea."

"Tea would be marvelous," Scarcity agreed, and set the rifle down and moved towards Claptrap.

"She needs to take her watch, Claptrap," Alacrity argued.

"Surely this can wait for tea, Alacrity. Besides, I think this particular brew will turn out quite nicely. But," she looked about her and pursed her lips. "I seem to be short of heat."

Alacrity felt somewhat better about the absence of fire, until a single halogen flare eked forth from Scarcity's rifle barrel. No reaction could be coaxed from the weapon for the entire morning, yet given the lack of heat, evidently she was now capable of harnessing the weapon in a fashion that was all but impossible to even the most gifted soldier. It was indeed the action of one in need - of a good cup of tea, anyways.