Tonio and the Blue Light

Tonio would do anything to get himself out of poverty. In the place where he grew-up, orphanages are almost non-existent. In fact, the reason why he grew-up in one is because he ran away. When his father died because of tuberculosis, he and his mother had to live with their relatives. Shortly thereafter, her mother also died on what appears to be deep remorse. His aunt was reluctant to take him having six children of her own. So, it was agreed upon that he would be passed year to year to the different relatives of his mother. As far as he could remember, it felt like hell.

One of her aunts would make her work at a bakery even though he was barely seven years old. He would wake-up before the sun even sets in. He could not attend school. He was often transferred from place to place; his relatives passing him like a ball unaware of the deep scars they have embedded within him.

One of his relatives would shout curses at him for making the slightest mistake. They would often say that it is better to keep a pig than someone like him. Then there was an uncle who would make him beg for alms. The earnings he would make would be used to buy alcoholic drinks instead of the things he badly needed. At a young age the he was in, he knew that something was wrong. With nothing to lose, he decided to run away.

The first few months were a nightmare as long as he can remember. Things have finally changed when he saw an orphanage and admitted himself there. He asked the nuns to take him in and he explained why. With the drab clothes he had, it was not hard to believe him. They admitted him on the condition that he would help take care of the much smaller kids. There he stayed. Frankly, it was not as that different from his life with his relatives. The only difference is that here, he learned how to read and write, as well as other basic things.

He worked hard to earn his keep though deep inside his little heart, there was nothing more than his wish to be rich. He would often see wealthy people donate something for the orphanage. He would stare in awe on how these people dress well, how they well they act, and how they seem to have so much that they can still give others large amounts of money. He envied them. Even in his prayers, he would ask God for him to become rich. But he also wanted more. He wanted to become rich more than anyone else because he saw that money is the only way he could be free.

When he was around 16-years old, he decided to step outside the orphanage. Being used to the hardships of life, he entered odd jobs from being a janitor to messenger to newspaper vendor. Being taught the religious ways, he did not engage in any illegal activities though he gambled a little. He was desperate. He wanted a better life when he discovered the lottery.

Playing the lottery provided him more than just a chance to win. For him, it also gave him a sense of freedom to dream. Like what would he do if he won this amount? He would spend countless hours daydreaming of that day. He wanted so much in life. He figured that he could get these things if he had money.

He met a young girl at one of the offices he had worked for. He quickly fell in love with her knowing that it would be next to impossible even just for her to take his love seriously. He started courting the girl by leaving flowers at her desk every morning much to her pleasant surprise. He would also try to write love letters though the grammar is not that good. He was content with just doing these things. But one day, the girl found out who he really is. He was turned down right away. The boss, fearing that he might do something stupid like stalk the young girl, fired him at once.

And this was not the first time he was turned down. In fact, it was a series of heartbreaks that almost made him crazy. There was Sonia. Sonia gave him hope that he is capable of loving and being loved. She was different from the rest of the girls she knew. She works at the place where he is the janitor. It may sound unbelievable but she accepted Tonio for what he is. In fact, she did more than that. She reciprocated the love that he gave her. For Tonio, it was the happiest moment of his life. With this feeling at hand, he believed that nothing could go wrong.

But this is not so. After more than three months of a rather blissful relationship, Sonia was sent by her parents abroad refusing to accept Tonio. He was poor. They said that he was not worthy of the love she has to give. He was poor. They said that their daughter has no future being with him. He was poor. They simply couldn't accept him.