Phantasm 1: For the Light of the Stars (two)

"Yes, of course. We all do. That’s not a bad attitude, it’s a good one. Makes you strong. Determined." He regarded her through his visor for a long moment. "That may be better in its own way."

"How long have you been an instructor?" asked Laura.

"A long time," said Noah distantly. "A very long time. I’ve trained many Chosen, at least a couple of hundred I suppose. Silverburgh is convinced you are special, talented. You’ll have to prove to me that you deserve the labels."

"I don’t think I do."

"Hmm, modesty. That’s something you’ll find many people lack here. Silverburgh in particular. You won’t be special at all if you believe you are. Talent comes not from having something to prove, it comes simply from doing it. It’s a part of you, it’s an instinct. Answer me this, before your training begins: are you prepared to complete it? To follow your training through all the way?"

"Yes. I am," Laura said without a hint of hesitation. "I want to learn. I’m prepared to do what is required of me."

Noah nodded slowly. "The Chosen must be confident but we must not fall into the trap of overconfidence. We must be people as well as guardians and protectors and warriors. The Chosen are more powerful than anyone else but we must remain as human as the people we serve."

"I am still human," said Laura, "I still feel."

"Really? Can you find the distinction that lies between feeling and influence?"

Laura frowned. "I don’t understand."

"Obviously." He shook his head but his visor didn’t seem to move with him, it must have been attached to him, surgically grafted, Laura supposed. "The Chosen have abilities that are so powerful, they can corrupt them if they are not careful. When they enter the mind, the most intimate part of a person, they see who or what that person is. In essence, they touch what is good and evil and right and wrong about them. The soul, or at least a manifestation of it. Laura, it’s natural for you to be moved by them, whenever you touch them you are moved by them. We all are. But when you touch them, can you simply be moved and not be dominated by what you see? You take a part of what you touch back with you. Can you take that and make it a part of you without losing a piece of yourself as well?"

"I don’t know, is that what you want me to say?" she said, her voice was raised and it gained the attention of a few people at nearby tables. "I don’t know," she said again, more softly.

"I want an honest answer," said Noah.

"I gave you one," said Laura.

"Okay, then. I believe you," said Noah. "That’s good, if you don’t know. I’m here to help you so you can."

"I thought you were here to make me into a weapon," said Laura.

"The Chosen aren’t weapons, Laura," he replied vehemently. "And I wouldn’t have the desire to fashion you as such even if we -- you -- were. We use what is available to us to protect justice, but we’re not weapons. Our abilities are weapons and that’s why we have to make sure no one will abuse them. If you can’t handle that then walk away right now. No one will stop you."

"No," Laura said. "I won’t walk away."

"Then soon we will begin. But not now. Not yet." Noah fished around in a compartment in his jump-suit, retrieving a cylindrical program which he handed to her. "This is your schedule. It shows when you train and when your time is free. Work out your own activities around that. We’ll begin later today."