What If

Always show respect. Always smile when greeting them and for god’s sake, never expect them to do anything more for you than what you would do for them. There are many people in this world that will hurt you. Many that will break your heart and many that will take something from you that you hold dear in your life. They are the ones that know you best and know your weak spots. Always treat everyone the same, never give too much information about yourself and never let your guard down. Remember always, the ones that will hurt you the most are the ones that are closest to you.

He also told me that night to chose my battles wisely. There will be many obstacles in my life. Many ups and many downs and many things that I just won’t be able to understand. There will be times in your life when you want more than anything to defend something to the death. But that isn’t always the way to go. Always stand up for what you believe in and know when the battle is over. It’s not always about which ones you win, but more of how you handle the ones you have lost. Life is not always about winning. It’s about dealing and coping with what has happened, and learning to move on from that point with the knowledge that this was a valuable lesson. Always forgive, never forget. To forgive is to be human, to forget is to let it happen again. All of my life I had been forgiving and forgetting that people had hurt me and I had opened myself up to allow them to do it again.

He told me that night that we would handle my problems together. I didn’t have to fear death anymore. I didn’t have to fear not knowing. He would keep me informed of everything that happened that involved me and he would keep my secrets safe with him until the day he died. I believed in him and I trusted in knowing that I was truly safe for the first time in my life. He told me that I would never be known as my mother’s daughter from that day forward. That I was my own person and my actions would reflect who I was as a person from that day on. I was about to start a new life in a new world to me. I was not to communicate with anyone from my past and until everything was straightened out, I was not to associate with anyone that had any dealings with anyone that had ever hurt me. He told me that night that no one was to know I was there and no one was to interfere with my progress. The road I was about to set on to was a long and hard one. One that would take a lifetime to complete and one that I would never regret going on. He was right. It was like he knew all that was going on in my life. Like he had stepped into my body and mind and knew exactly what to say to steer me towards the right path.

It took many months to retrain my way of thinking, my way of living and my way of life. He took the time and had the patience to do so. Many things changed in my life as a result of that one night.