The Continuing Adventures of Farfinkle and Friends

No sooner had Grainger enter the field when play started once again. He ran down the field and received a long ‘smack-a-rat’ throw from his midfielder. He caught it with his

outstretched trunk in mid stride. Stopping short to throw the defense off, he tossed the ‘little critter’ high in the air over the defender in front of him and performed his world-renowned ‘twisting helicopter maneuver’ and left the opposing player splayed out on all fours to his eternal embarrassment (you should see the photograph in the newspaper).

Grainger had run almost ten yards when he came to a sudden stop and with "the grace of a Baryshnikov, the agility of a gymnast and the timing of a Rolex" (that is why no serious author would ever think of writing for a newspaper, such terrible hyperbole’), he raised his right rear foot just as the critter came down on it. Performing a quick ‘Joely-oely’ maneuver (named after the star player who invented it), he tossed the rat over his head onto the ground in front of him and as he bounced, kicked that little critter for all he was worth. He flew between the goal posts as the horns were blown. After they checked the instant replay on the jumbotron monitor at the end of the field, the goal was counted, an all-time smush was performed and somehow Grainger was carried off the field to the delight of the hometown fans!

"Now that’s writing, I could read him all day!"

"I’ll bet you could Al."

Aloysius slowly lowered his paper, and there stood Eddie the Gent on his table. He had four very large and not too good-looking companions with him. He had brought the ‘Enforcer Squad’ with him. Aloysius swallowed very hard and very dry. "Hello Eddie, what can I do for you."

He no sooner said that than two other even larger (and uglier) mice jumped up on the table carrying what looked like a rather strange billiard ball. "You can tell me what this is." Eddie’s face had a very hard look about it.

Aloysius looked a moment and replied, "why I do believe that’s Grainger’s eyeball."

Eddie raised his right paw once and before Aloysius could say a word, the two mice threw it off the table. It struck the floor with a loud crack and proceeded to break into many small pieces that flew into all corners of the room. "That was most definitely NOT Grainger’s eye, now was it!"

This time, it was Aloysius’ turn to smile as he said, "no Eddie, I guess it wasn’t. By the way, I am glad you came over, you saved us a trip. I believe you owe us some money." And with that Catey stepped from behind the clock on the fireplace mantle. "That’s right Eddie, you owe us a lot of money."

"What’s going on here; what sort of game have you two been playing on us. Me and the boys won’t put up with any nonsense from the likes of you!" The menace and anger oozing from his lips seemed to have no effect on the two of them. It surprised Eddie so much he stopped his right arm in mid-raise.

"I’ll tell you what is going on here Eddie, it’s like this. You see we figured, that is Catey here, Grainger, Farfinkle and myself figured", and just as he said this the others stepped into the room from the hallway where they were waiting quietly, "that if Farfinkle could whip up a phony eye with his wizardry, Catey could charm her way into your lair and make a switch (which she did). I then used my formula to predict exactly when Grainger should enter the game to insure his team the victory. As someone I know once said ‘an eye a Grainger, a Grainger his team wins, his team wins and I own the game’! It’s time to pay up." A tense silence settled on the room.