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Submitted by Bseri77 (Jul 06, 2005)

Great poem! Many people think those thoughts and just can't seem to get them fdown on paper. I would eliminate your commas in the beginning since the rest of the poem flows nicely without them. Be consistent.

I loved it,it shows feelings that some people are afraid to express. Good job. I wish I could write like that.

Really good, nice emotional content. I wish I could say I couldn't identify. By the way, it's "lie". B5