Back to story

Submitted by Chantal (Jun 20, 2007)

Thank you i really like it. I think you could develop part one a little more with some more info about Aline's childhood, her parents, the battle etc. So far so good. I would love to hear more. Blessings, Chantal

Good story when paired with the first two parts. Well written and with few errors in grammar. I am thinking of starting a story myself. It seems to have a good plot and easy enough to understand and I think you got the things that make a good story into it (like conflict between the members of he council) and I like taht you've managed to get a bit of the worlds history in there along with some mentionings of other countries (or are they cities?). The only critique I actually have is that it sounds like it is the writing of a chapter instead of a prologue though I see one reason why you would make these parts your prologue. I would like to read the rest of this story so feel free to email it to me when you can and if you wish.