untitled by Shannon G

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I am writing you an e-mail
that you will never get
my time bomb is ticking
and the alarm on it is set
what I have to say may be different
so I hope that its okay
but I guess it wouldnt matter
because I'm saying anyway
it hurts me when I talk to you
everyday on the phone
because when i have to let you go
it makes me feel alone
but then again I love it
because your voice, it makes me glad
I try to reword this over again
but it only makes me mad
I think and think to find the words
but it all comes out blank
I mean to say I love you
but it comes lower out in rank
then you're forced to say it first
and I always freeze up
I wish I could say it
I really, really do
that's why I'm writing you this poem
to prove myself to you
but you will never read it
so I guess it doesn't matter
you can just forget it
and not know what I'm feeling...ever