The Morning After Christmas by Michael James

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Twas The Morning after christmas and all through the house everyone was sturing including the mouse.
The stockings were strewn all over the floor without a care.
After Saint Nicolas had already been there.
The Tree was tipped over and the orniments lay aury, wrapping paper lay all over the floor, only the mouse knows where.
I ran down the hallway tripping over toys to answer a knock at the door.
Only to find the dog standing there.
I turned around and got a glimps of my wife puking over the stair rail.
Thats when the kids started to wail because they don't feel well.
I unplugged the lights cause I thought might as well.
The lights were half burnt out and the others were just about there.
Here it is the morning after christmas the lights were half broke because of the kids and their new toys plus the dog and his efforts to play with the kids and their toys.
The worst part is we have three boys, who would like nothing better then to play with their toys. And by the end of the night most of the toys are broken and I think one of my ankles got broken with them because I tripped over each one in my hurry to get to the door.
Just then my wife whispers "honey I think I'm pregnant" and my jaw hits the floor as she says merry late christmas I should have told you before.
Then I hit the floor, about the time I came to I had blood on and in my shoe. And my wife said when I came to that "the dogs not a male and " I think she's pregnant too."
This is where I say " Merry F*cking late Christmas and a Happy New Year!