Paradise of the Mind by Kathy Mayes

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Dazed, I shake my head and I start to wonder, wow what a strange dream. I turn about my room once more, and everything is just as I remember. I've been staying here awhile, a extended vacation of sorts for me and my husband, but where is he? Shrugging, I turn to go shower and dress, and things skew again. Things are out of place in my room. I thought I had a balcony in this room instead of a window, and a hospital bed doesn't belong in here. What happened to my large feather-soft bed that used to be in here? Confused, I shake my head and things once again go out of proportions, as dizziness and nausea engulf me.

I feel myself coming back into consciousness, and I feel my muscles jerking with the uncontrolled spasms of convulsions. I hear a voice calling to me from a distance, and while focusing on that I can finally open my eyes. I am once again in the hospital room, but I'm now, lying on a cold tile floor. It seems I had passed out and fallen, between the head of my little bed and the wall, and shoving the bed forward and partially jamming the door. I can see a harried nurse standing in the doorway. The bed has been pushed almost sideways in an effort to open my door. I finally notice that I'm being held, and I look at who is there. I'm expecting to see my husband, but instead I see a doctor. He is talking to me, trying to ease me out of convulsing, and I am slowly able to stop the spasms, relaxing and focusing on his voice. I can't seem to speak, but I turn to him and plead with everything I've got with my eyes, for him to please help me. I'm confused and afraid. I don't know what's going on or what's happening to me. I try to focus on his voice, but it still doesn't make sense to me. I concentrate, his voice clears in my mind and now I can understand some of what he's saying. Still not being able to speak myself, I look toward him in revelation. He is telling the nurse, "...we have to remove the device. Her brain is rejecting it." I feel his arms reaching around me to pick me up, but now, without my focus, I begin convulsing once more. Just as my mind passes into darkness once more, I hear him once again say, "We have to get rid of that thing, it's killing her and I can't stand it."