I avoided Untar for the remainder of the day, uncomfortable with him and the feeling I got. There was something unsettling about him and I longed for Tharina to come home so I could ask her about it. But until she got back I was expecting to find excuses to leave every time he entered the room. Unfortunately, I had shown him my secret place so I couldn't run there.
The next day I was searching through the kitchen cabinets for something to eat, when Untar came in claiming an empty stomach. I had missed breakfast that morning so as to avoid Untar and my stomach seemed to growl at me angrily when I attempted to leave the room. Knowing that if I didn't comply I would be annoyed all afternoon I stopped when Untar spoke. "It seems, Senara, that you have been avoiding me ever since yesterday afternoon." I could feel his eyes burning into my back as I searched for something edible.
I turned to face him. "I'm not avoiding you. I have a lot to do when Tharina is not here." I explained. I reached randomly into the cabinet and grabbed something to eat. Unfortunately I grabbed celery, my least favorite food. But I needed to leave so I headed for the door.
Untar grabbed my wrist before I left. "Don't you need something to eat with?" He said offering a fork. I took it quickly and raced up the stairs. Running into the sanctuary I shut the door behind me. Quickly I locked the door and set the beets and fork down at the same time.
Breathing in the fresh scent of Jasmine I looked around me at the sanctuary. Along the walls numerous Goddess totems stood. The room was open and the only light came from candles lit around the room. No one but Tharina and me were allowed in this room, not even Marian and I had had to earn the right, or privilege as Tharina called it, to enter. Problems were solved here, and guidance was given. And as I stood there looking around me the room started its Magick. I closed me eyes and started turning in circles. My arms moved towards the ceiling and I let the sleeves of my dress fall down to my elbows. I spun faster feeling the energy surround me and fill me. It was in the entire room beating in a heavy rhythm with my bare feet on the floor. But soon I could not hold it anymore and I released it. I slowed down my speed and when I had stopped I stood in front of a Goddess that had never come in front of me before. Gaia, the earth Goddess.
I quickly tried to recall everything I knew about her. She was the Goddess of the earth and everything alive, a mother earth, Nature's power was held in her hand. I sat down in front of her and meditated. My hope was that something would come to me, anything. Despite my connection to Nature I wasn't sure why the Earth Goddess was the Goddess that would help me. My deep trance continued for hours but was disrupted by my stomach that continued to growl in angry protest.
I knew it was time to really eat by that sound. The reason I hadn't eaten for so long was because of Untar. How could I talk to him when all I felt around him was pain? A pain I couldn't stand?
Days passed without much trouble.