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I know, because its the same argument I had played with myself dozens, hundreds of times over. I had desperately wanted to find a persuasive reason not to go to Mars, to stay and honour Terry's memory and stand by my own political ideals. But I couldn't justify letting my own beliefs stand in the way of giving my children a quality of life that humans hadn't known for centuries gone.

Muttering her goodbyes I saw Janny reach forward dejectedly and switch the holocom off at her end. I was sorry for doing this to her, despite our differences, I really was. But if Terry's memory wasn't enough to stop me, my feelings of guilt towards his mother definitely wasn't.

I had already started packing our belonginngs up. The removal men will be arriving in a few days to load it all up to the ship in preparation for our 3 month journey. But before that I was going to bed, to cry myself to sleep like I had every night for months now. I don't know if I will ever get over this guilt, but I do know I am doing the right thing. I think.