Untitled by Tari Xalyr
 (1 rating)
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SUMMARY: i wrote this at a workshop and was asked to get some crit on it and expand it a little so thats what i'm doin and all your feedback would be considered.
Cheers
~ Tari ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Untitled~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
By Rebecca Alosi 15/3/05
A thick fog clawed it's way across the abandoned street. There was no moon this night for the clouds dominated the sky. Barry shivered, he'd forgotten the last time he'd felt the sun on his now ghostly pale complexion. He glanced across at his older sister. Betty was walking tall and proud, her hair wisped across her face as she walked. She hadn't always been this proud. She reminded Barry of their mum, tall and strong with long black hair. Betty, he whispered under his breath so she couldn't hear. How long had it been since someone had called her that? They all called her Kal now. Kal was not like the Betty, Barry had known. Betty was kind and loving but Kal, Kal was different. She had a heart of ice and eye‘s to match but still Barry still saw her as his older, loving sister, the girl she had once been. A dog barked nearby, Barry jumped grabbing hold of Betty's blood stained shirt. Betty recoiled slightly at Barry's touch. He wasn't supposed to have seen but he had but there was nothing she could do about it now. She sensed his fear. Fear of being caught, his fear of his now unknown life. Fear of her, his own sister, his only family left. She glanced down at his frail, ragged figure. She could see it in his eyes, it was etched all over his face. He reeked of it. She remembered Arken and how she had been able to smell his fear before she killed him. But the fear etched all over her little brother was not that sort of fear, it was a fear of her and who she had become. She slinked into a side alley, quickly pulling Barry after her. She crouched down in front of him, taking his hands in hers. Barry's eyes were skittering everywhere, searching for something else to focus on something other then Betty's eyes. Betty had her mothers eyes, icy blue and hypnotising. Barry feared those eyes and she knew it. He feared them like everyone else in their coven did. Betty was powerful and now he understood just how powerful, first hand.
"I did it for the Coven. I did it for us, Baz, for us." she whispered . . . . . . . .
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Original~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
By Rebecca Alosi 15/3/05
A thick fog clawed its way across the abandoned street. There was no moon this night for the clouds dominated the sky. Barry shivered, he'd forgotten how the sun had once felt on his now ghostly pale skin. He glanced across at his older sister. Betty was walking tall and proud, her black hair wisped across her face as she walked. A dog barked in the distance, Barry jumped grabbing hold of Betty's blood stained shirt. Betty recoiled slightly at his touch. He wasn't supposed to see what had happened but he had and there was nothing she could do about it now. She glanced down at his frail, ragged figure, she cold see it in his eyes, it was etched into his face. Fear. She stepped off into a side alley pulling barry with her. She crouched down in front of him. Barry franticly searched for somewhere else to look but was caught by betty's eyes. He feared those eyes like everyone else in their coven did. Betty was powerful and no he'd seen it first hand.
"I did it for the coven. I did it for us, Baz." she whispered.
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