War is all we know by Michael Neale

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The ship was called the Painkiller and had two giant rocket boosters that burnt biodiesel made from Shlops for propulsion. For this trip however, the Painkiller would have to travel at thrash metal speed and would have to be equipped with the necessary amp power to push the ship through space twice the speed of light. The giant amps were about as big as the ship itself and were installed on the back. The crew's supplies consisted mostly of food and Urunbrew plus most importantly all the instruments needed to blast thrash metal. Ctwat brought a few specimens of the pest in a jar to compare and see if what they find will kill it. Once all systems checked, the rockets exploded and the ship accelerated out of the atmosphere into space as everyone waved goodbye.
"We must initiate thrash metal speed at once, set the coordinates and take your positions," said Dark Lord. As Bruce pulled some levers and turned a few dials the ship turned and pointed in the right direction.
As well as being great Urunbrew brewers, Brewskys are also excellent metal musicians. They specialize in thrash metal, which is the fastest and loudest music in the entire universe. From an early age young Brewskys would be taught their specific role in Urunbrew production as well as how to play and master a specific metal instrument.
The crew took their positions and picked up their instruments. Dark Lord played bass, Ctwat played the drums, Udem and Oderus each played guitar, and Bruce sang. Ever since Bruce arrived on Urineus and started playing metal with the brewskys DL was amazed by the guy's voice. He told DL he played in a metal band on Earth called Iron Maiden and when Bruce played him some of their tunes DL was quite impressed and told him it was the best alien metal he had ever heard in his life.
Anyway, the guys picked up their axes and began to jam some head blowing fast metal and the ship instantly disappeared into the void. The sound they made was so loud it was heard across the galaxy and beyond eventually reaching Earth where it deafecated every living thing on the planet.
The crew spent their long trip playing metal, eating, drinking, and sleeping. One day during the voyage a red light on the main console began to flash and interrupted their jam.
"Hold up, that red light is bugging the bile out of me," said DL.
"It's the warning light, I'll go check it out," said, Bruce. He walked over to the motherboard. "Crap, were heading straight for a black hole. We must avoid it, who knows what we will become or where we will appear if we enter it."
"Not to worry my alien metal brother, may I remind you we are cruising at thrash metal speed and there is no black hole in the universe that can capture us. We will simply blast right through it and be on our way."
"Well alright," said Bruce.
"Lets keep playing to maintain maximum speed," said Oderus.
"Well alright," everyone said, and they began to shred. The Painkiller flew right into the giant black hole and wasn't even phased. It was in and out before the massive force of the holes gravity could reel it in.