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The person you care about comes first overall so I know she is happy with him and that is all I care about. The true key to being happy when in love knows the other person even if you are not with them is happy. We talked all period which made me extremely happy. I have extremely strong feelings for her. I think she knows how I feel but I don't want to know. I do not want her to find out how I feel. It would ruin our friendship.
I do not have a history of depression but every time I am with her I feel extremely depressed because the way I feel about her can never be shown the bell rang which really upset me because we were really into our conversation. We were talking about football and school. We both decided to end our conversation and get to our next class before we would be late. We both walked out the door when my chest felt on fire and I could not breathe. I passed out and I was in a room. I saw an alien so hideous that I almost gaged from the look of it.
It said something in a language that I did not understand. The talking went on for which felt like years. It started to blur and I awoke on a hospital bed with Anastasia sitting at my side. "OH my god he's awake" she ran out of the room and came back with my parents and a team of doctors. My mom came over and hugged me tight" honey we were so worried, we feared you would not live to see your eighteenth birthday". "What happened" I said looking worried. "You had serious, almost fatal asthma attack, this young girl acted quickly and saved your life" the doctor said.
I glanced over at Anastasia and gave her a thank you look. She smiled and whispered in my ear" never scare me like that again". My mom said that Anastasia came here every day after school and sat by your side for hours. Anastasia told me that her boyfriend did not like it but understood why she had to do it .I gave a week smile and asked how long I was out. The doctor said you have been asleep for almost a month. With a panicked look I looked over at the clock which had the date on it and it was one day before my birthday. Anastasia told me everything of what happened after I passed out. They let me go that night because I was in good enough health.
We left the hospital and Anastasia gave me a kiss on the cheek. I blushed when her lips touched my cheeks. She told me not to tell her boyfriend and got into her parents car. I got home and it was as if a dart pierced my heart. The feelings I feel for her are stronger than any feeling I ever experienced. My heart is in pain every time I am with her because I know I can never express my feelings for her. It feels like my heart has been ripped into a million pieces and I don't have anyone to glue on the pieces. I have felt like this since I met her.
I was laying in my bed thinking about her when I decided to get up and practice a song I was working on the guitar.