I Never Think About It All That Much by Roy Neyman


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SUMMARY: Musings on creation

I never think about it all that much, being there instead of here. Outside instead of inside. They're both the same to me. What purpose does it serve to contemplate where or when or what? I'm here, it's now, I am what I am. That was the problem, I was suddenly pulled somewhere else. I found myself at the focal point of a cosmos that was swirling about me. The pull of its billions and billions of worlds was trying to distract the motes of my being into dispersing throughout the ancient universe. Now that just wouldn't do. I wasn't in the mood, so I concentrated, pouring all my will into winning this tug of war that the fabric of space had challenged me to. The energy I invested was no small matter.

Looking about at the eternal swirl of cosmic light, I could see the majestic orbits of galaxies and stars begin to slow and curve inward toward me until all of them had become just specs of light that grew steadily in size. No longer caught up in their eternal dos-i-do, they were coming nearer and nearer. As their momentum increased I could feel the increasing force of my exertion. Accelerating, they doubled, quadrupled, octupled their speeds and more. The blue shift of their light painted the blackness around me into a spherical sunset, deep indigo at the event horizon of my will, rose reds and golden yellows at the farthest reaches of time and space.

As their increasing proximity took over and the average mass around me assumed the burden of my work, I relaxed and returned to my usual place outside of existence. The collapse of this universe was a foregone conclusion and I sat back to watch the spectacle. It would coalesce at first into a glowing orb of decreasing size but exponentially increasing density, generating more energy than any of its pitiful beings could imagine. Soon it would impose upon itself such a powerful gravitational field that not even its light or heat could escape and it would wink out of existence.

A thought's breadth later, it would blossom again, dispersing itself outward to create a fresh new universe for me to behold at my leisure until I was summoned back again to call the steps in the cosmic dance.