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(Page 3 of 4) The Escape by Walter Mallon
(4 ratings)
| All fear has left me.
I wander, meandering through the trees and the grass. What is this place? How did I get here? My ship is no where in sight. It doesn't matter though. I don't feel like it matters. Nothing seems important now. Nothing, that is, as mundane as the reality my wretched race has ensconced itself in. Here, there is a new reality . . . new emotions and feelings . . . a true reality. All that was important to me is no longer of any significance. There is a new world here . . . new thoughts . . . thoughts that were beyond comprehension on Aronstar. On Aronstar there were principles, here there are none. There is no good or evil . . . no right or wrong . . . no war or peace . . . there is no need because there is no polarity, no ying and yang. Our reasoning was shallow, nonexistent compared with this. Here is a higher plane . . . above reason . . . above emotion . . . above even love. There are no opposing forces. I have searched, and I have found that which I seek.
I see a river, a stream of crystal blue. I walk into it. I am floating in the river. All is constant, never stopping. Ceasement of motion does not exist. Not in the stream. I feel the breeze blowing through my flaxen hair. I see the stars of other worlds, worlds that are the same. There is no other being. All is equal in the stars. There is no fluctuation in existence no bending in time. The water does not flow, it . . . there is no word to describe it. I exist on it, in it, and with it. The river runs on and on through fields of green and colored trees. It feels my presence, and it welcomes me.
I swoon but I am conscious. My thoughts are the thoughts of being. I realize that I am indigenous to all that surrounds me. I have always been here, but I am just now awakening to it. This perfect order is not tainted with subjectivity. All is the same with the thoughts and feelings of all matter that pervades existence. There is no need to understand because there is no contention, no discord, no doubt.
Out of the river is a castle. Its pinnacles extending far into the clouds above. It is indescribably beautiful. There is a clear pool surrounding the walls. I hesitate to call it a mote. In the pool is passion. An everlasting passion that exists for its own purpose. A passion not for anything imaginable on Ulthanck. Ulthanck is no more. It does not exist in this place. It does not matter. The memories are but just a dream now. I can't imagine ever wanting to go there.
Inside, the castle is a world all its own. Splendid tapestries fly from poles of silver. I cannot see the ceiling, though I'm sure it is ethereal. Clouds have ventured in through the open windows, high on the walls. There is a flight of golden steps far down the hall. I walk to the steps, a force guiding me. Atop the stairs sits a mighty throne. It is made of essence. It is the crown of existence, the tree of life.
As I sit, I wonder for the first time if I am in heaven. I don't know. Could it be that there is no heaven, at least in the sense I have always imagined it? I am not dead. Perhaps there is no death. Perhaps all I knew on Aronstar was not real.
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