[gabador]

Hello,
if this is a bit early, then send any critiques a bit later.

This is the first few chapters of my Epic novel, called Duel. It might be three books once I'm finished, or it might be one.

Anyway. I'm worried about the following points, and would like some opinions on:

Dialogues: Amount of, and are they any good?
Characters: Believable? Likeable?
Feeling you get through: Dark, merry, mysterious, sleepy?
I'm also worried that I have way too many action scenes in there. If that's te case, say so, and I'll slow it down.

I also have the story on a site : www.stories.com/authors/gabador (http://www.stories.com/authors/gabador)
But it doesn't have all the pictures the e-mail will have.

Don't worry about the size of the piece. They're small book-seize pages.
All I ask is that you read the first five chapters, cause they're mainly about different characters.

Ok, I'll stop now. Hope you'll enjoy it.
Gabador

[estranghero]

D'ya send the email already?

Re:jfnacino@yahoo.com

[gabador]

Yup, should be over by now.
Gabador

[Solaar]

Do I get one or do I still wait for authorisation?

Solaar
waiting in the wings

[enazwo]

You should have already received a copy. I forwarded the story, myself, to your email address.

enazwo

[kassimir funk]

Please e-mail it to me at this address. Specter_78@yahoo.com

[gabador]

Is it really that bad? I wonder, because this is taking people the most time to read through. It mus be really boring. http://www.sffworld.com/ubb/frown.gif
Oh well, I'll wait a while longer.

[Solaar]

Have no fear - I pick up my emails on Thursday and shal comment then!

Solaar
wants to go home to get it

[enazwo]

Fear not
I have been busy with other projects and I have also been reading your's as well. I like to digest what I have read before I comment too. And just so you know, what I have read I have really enjoyed. Very well thought out and comprehensive.
Realize there's also 90 some pages as well, and with a couple other committments its taking little longer. So don't take this longer response period as an affront to your considerable talent.
enazwo

[Solaar]

Woooaaaah!! Big File!

Have no fear, it is downloaded and I am going home to read it and comment on it now (I've had to put it on a disk at work) so expect comments from me tomorrow night ;o)

Solaar
will be back