[Gemini]

Hahahaha send me a link to this hilarity Em! I saw your LJ post and it made me lol, espcially that picture... but i want to view all these silly spoilers.

Its such a shame those books have such attractive covers... lol

What's even funnier is that the hardcore fans are still refusing to believe it's real:D:D


If you've got a P2P program that's apart of the Gnutella network (Bearshare, emule and so on) the files of the first 14 chapters are there now.

WOOHOO! Fight the Power!

DOWNLOAD LINKS ARE BACK UP! PM me if you want them.

[Ashe]

XD I always hated those books with a passion. It's going to be hilarious to watch the 'I <3 Edward' crew's reactions... :D

[Sirkana]

just been looking at amazon us...it's surreal at how much of a flop it has been. :D but i'll probably buy it anyway :eek:

[Gemini]

Oh man, the fail. So EPIC.

I finished it laaaate last night and ... just ... AUGH.

I knew that this book would be bad, but this? Wow.

It continued to be a full on Mary-Sue-self-insert-wish-fulfilment-fest for Bella, because she's so perfect and better than everyone at everything, including, oh wow, what a surprise, being a vampire!

As usual Smeyer shows a blatant disregard for the basic rules of grammar and just good sentence structure in general.

I really want to find her editor and give her/him/it a good hiding, DID ANYONE INVOLVED IN THE PUBLICATION OF THESE BOOKS HAVE ANY FORMAL TRAINING?! I know Smeyer didn't *grumble* and someone should tell her that's not something to be proud of in her case.

Though I did enjoy the snark from the wolves and Jacob's chapter titles where amusing... I like the way that kid thinks (sometimes, he was an ass in Eclipse, don't deny it). But his character arch was just, *weep*

IMPRINTING ON NESSIE?

I'd read all the spoilers beforehand and it didn't make it any less creepy. I don't care about the whole "He'll be whatever she needs, a brother, a friend, a lover..." crap, it's just too weird.

I don't why Smeyer has such a bizarre obsession with all these borderline paedophilic relationships. Pedobear loves it. Me, not so much. No Smeyer! Bad Smeyer!"

A far better resolution for him would have been a relationship with Leah.

And, that name. Whut now?

RENESMEE?! At some point I started saying it in my head as "Tre Semme (http://www.tresemme.com/)".

I laughed and laughed and laughed.

The birth too! I have no idea how Smeyer thinks they'll be able to include that in a movie and still get away with a PG-13 rating. IT BREAKS HER SPINE AND EDWARD CHEWS IT OUT WITH HIS TEETH. Whut? No!

It's also funny that Smeyer has gone so far as to break her own canon. I know she's going to have some BS excuse to worm her way around it though. She does it all the time, the dodge and evade and the "You just don't get it!" *whiiinnnee*, when people accuse the books of being anti-feminist.

What enrages me more than anything is this blatant subtext telling girls the world over that "your only ambition should be to get married! Get married and have kids! You're nothing unless you do! Don't go to college, use it as leverage to get sex from your a-hole abusive and controlling husband!" WHAT? ASDLKAS;ANARARRRGHHHHHH. I hate it. HATE IT HATE HATE HATE.

*deep breath*

Pretty much every female in this book (And the others) is portrayed as wanting children/ marriage and those who can't/ are unable are bitter, twisted harpies who moan about what they can't have. The only character to ever have been "against" marriage, Renee, is just thrilled when she hears that Bella's getting hitched :|. Then we have Bella herself, who used to not want to get married but, of course, all her doubts disappear the second she has the wedding dress on. Then everything's all sunshine, puppies and meadows.

Excuse me while I bash my head against the wall.

If you'd like to revel in the FAIL, check out mmmcradle (http://community.livejournal.com/mmmcradle/) or Twilight_sucks. (http://community.livejournal.com/twilight_sucks/)

Keep in mind, this is my own opinion, I'm allowed to express it. You can like the book for all I care, just don't try to convince me it was anything other than really bad Crack!Fic churned out for money. You won't.

[Liana]

I was actually thinking about buying Breaking Dawn. Then I saw the spoilers and have spent the last five days laughing at all the posts on LJ. As they've said over there, it is indeed a wonderful time to be a twilight hater. You don't even have to mock the book, it does that all by itself. All you have to do is sit back and watch the fandom implode.

But seriously, don't buy the book. The more copies it sells, the more money smeyer makes, and the more her sales figures go up. And then all the suck-up journalists will fawn over her even more and claim she's the new J.K. Rowling (which they're already doing:mad:)

I may have to read the book anyway, just for my own sick amusement:p It's just lucky I ordered it from the library.

[Jennistar]

Breaking Dawn came out in the stores today and I had the MISFORTUNE to be working...
MAN, the queues!!! I shall have nightmares tonight about that damn bookcover...:eek: :o All those wide-eyed, crazed fangirls...it reminded me of when I was hunting for The Singing :rolleyes:
Anyways, I read the last chapter for the hell of it - I'm only on book 2 and I got bored halfway through so you won't catch ME buying them! It was soooo predictable, I laughed out loud :D. My work mates were all cooing about it, trying to stop me from telling them the ending...but it's not like it's going to come as a surprise.
One thing I will say, Smeyer has a good writing style. It's not the most descriptive in the world, but she makes the writing flow. I was expecting it to be in the same category as Dan Brown *growls*...but at least its SLIGHTLY better.
But honestly. What a load of trash! ...At least we made money from it though :D

[Gemini]

You know what the best thing is? Like Liana said, Smeyer did this to herself, us haters didn't have to life a finger, we sat back and watched the fandom slowly tear itself apart in rage and disappointment, bliss.

Even better are all the stories from bookstore workers and former fans about how they're returning the book and hearing comments like "You're the 20th person today..."

Also, here are some figures for you, Breaking Fail only sold 250 000 in its first day (Now minus the thousands that have been returned it BAHAHAH).

Deathly Hollows sold 11 MILLION.

Whoever said Smeyer was the next JKR is delusional.

[Adamin]

Vampire stories are so trite. I've never even heard of Deathly Hollows.

[cherie]

I won't, I can wait til the fourth...and even if it's pretty bad I'll get it. :o


Sirkana. I dont understand why there are so many negative comments about Breaking Dawn. I personally LOVED the book.

Personal opinion i guess.

[cherie]

Vampire stories are so trite. I've never even heard of Deathly Hollows.

Deathly Hallows is the final Harry potter book.