[Eldanuumea]

Some of us married longer than ten years want to have our say, so here is a thread just for us.

1. Where did you meet your spouse?
2. How do you handle conflicts with your spouse?
3. Best/Worst thing about being married?
4. What kind of wedding did you have -big, small, Vegas?
5. How did he/she propose?
6. What did the in-laws think of you?
7. What are your household responsibilities?
8. Did you live together before marrying?
9. What were your decisions about children?
10. How did you fall in love?
11. What advice would you give to a couple that has decided to get married at a young age?
12. What's the hardest thing in your opinion about being married in today's society?

[Eldanuumea]

1. Where did you meet your spouse?
We met on a college bus; I had my friends take up all the seats so the only one left when he got on was next to me!

2. How do you handle conflicts with your spouse?
Not very well, I'm afraid. I hate conflict, and tend to clam up completely. He is a yeller, and I usually let him rant and rave till he wears himself out. then I have my say.

3. Best/Worst thing about being married?
Best thing is, never being alone. Worst thing is, never being alone.

4. What kind of wedding did you have -big, small, Vegas?
None at all, beacause we eloped.

5. How did he/she propose?
Two weeks after we met, he asked me to marry him, while we were sitting on the rocks next to the Mississippi River in front of Jackson Square.

6. What did the in-laws think of you?
I think they liked me a lot. they were glad to see their hippy prodigal safely tied to a church-going home girl.

7. What are your household responsibilities?
Basically everything.

8. Did you live together before marrying?
For all of about one day. We did sleep together a couple of months before we wed.....used to cut classes and use a friend's apartment. But we had exchanged what we considered to be marriage vows, and considered ourselves firmly betrothed in the eyes of God.

9. What were your decisions about children?
We didn't make any decisions. I never, ever used any form of birth control whatsoever. We left that to God. And He did a damn good job.

10. How did you fall in love?
I saw this guy getting on my school bus, wearing a tweed blazer with leather elbow patches and carrying a briefcase, wearing glasses, generally looking highly intelligent.....my dream guy!

11. What advice would you give to a couple that has decided to get married at a young age?
Wait. Wait. Wait.

12. What's the hardest thing in your opinion about being married in today's society?
Everyone sort of expects divorce nowadays. People don't go into marriage with a firm commitment to actually love for better or worse, until death. Too many voices are encouraging people to get out of what they consider uncomfortable relationships so they can "find themselves" and be happy. Balderdash.

*********Forgot to say how long we've been married....LOL......on May 6th, we will celebrate our 34th anniversary. :D

[MrBF1V3]

Wow, 34, :cool:

Okay, here we go again. (Wonder if my answers will change?) We were married in June of 1991, as it turns out, right between our children's birthdays. (We didn't know that at the time).

1. Where did you meet your spouse?
At church, I was steamed at my old church, a friend invited me to hers. (My friend wasn't there that week.) Then we kept running into each other almost every day for the next week.

2. How do you handle conflicts with your spouse?
In any number of ways, it depends. Generally there is an explosion followed by a still silence, then talking, reasoning and resolution.

3. Best/Worst thing about being married?
Best-Having someone who is on my side, and who doesn't laugh at my knobby knees. Worst-Not always getting to do what I want to when I want to.

4. What kind of wedding did you have -big, small, Vegas?
About a hundred people, most of them on her side (we didn't have "sides"), of course we got married near where she grew up. One of her ex boyfriends showed up in his security guard uniform, including the gun. :eek:

5. How did he/she propose?
I asked her out, and met her at work with a dozen roses. The ring was in the card envelope. I think I surprised her. Her exact words were, "I don't know what to say."

6. What did the in-laws think of you?
We get along just fine, they tried once to get me to side with them against her. Once.

7. What are your household responsibilities?
We kind of split up most things, unless one of us is good at something.

8. Did you live together before marrying?
I slept on her couch a few times.

9. What were your decisions about children?
We waited a bit, had more than one, about three years apart.

10. How did you fall in love?
Which time? We spent a lot of sleepless nights talking, and talking, --I know it sounds boring, but it wasn't.

11. What advice would you give to a couple that has decided to get married at a young age?
Do yourself a favor, forget the name of every ex you ever had. "Whats-her-name" works really well. Oh, and erase from your vocabulary phrases like, "Wow, I didn't know they made panties this big."

12. What's the hardest thing in your opinion about being married in today's society?
The list goes on. I think if we hadn't made a clear decision in the beginning there would have been major trouble more than once.
B5

[Hereford Eye]

After 36.5 years.
1. Where did you meet your spouse? She was my 2nd youngest sister's best friend hanging about my brother's house when I came home from Vietnam on leave.
2. How do you handle conflicts with your spouse? We generally talk them out. Eventually. When we're ready to talk. Most significant stress point is finances. I'm a spender; she's a saver. We never start eye-to-eye.
3. Best/Worst thing about being married?
Best thing is to have a best friend willing to tell me when I am over the top and then let me stay there if I want to.
4. What kind of wedding did you have -big, small, Vegas? Maid of Honor, three bridesmaids and probably two hundred guests.
5. How did he/she propose? I proposed in the front seat of my first car, a Corvette, at the drive-in attending but seeing very little of the The Thomas Crown Affair, original version.
6. What did the in-laws think of you? Hey, I had a Corvette!
7. What are your household responsibilities? Whatever needs doing today. Live in the desert so there is no lawn to care for so no outside chores. The Lady Who Shares Her Life With Me has two gardens that I am content to avoid.
8. Did you live together before marrying? Let's see, we had two weeks together before I returned to Vietnam and 6 days when I returned before we were married. Is that living together?
9. What were your decisions about children? We were in favor of children but only one showed up so we adopted a second.
10. How did you fall in love? The usual way. Spent every possible minute with her for two weeks, wrote letters not as faithfully as I should have, and married her quick.
11. What advice would you give to a couple that has decided to get married at a young age? Get away from family and in-laws for a year or two. Learning to live together is difficult enough without family "helping."
12. What's the hardest thing in your opinion about being married in today's society? Learning/remembering how important she is to my life.

[silverfang]

1. Where did you meet your spouse?
We happen to meet through internationale correspondence,starting of each on our side of the ocean.
We married March 31th,1984…she was 18 and I was 21
2. How do you handle conflicts with your spouse?
Not very well,I'm sure…the fear of being too intense holds me back from what should be said.
So in lage I bring up the argument and she wins….and occasunally I do also.
3. Best/Worst thing about being married?
After a while realizing that one belongs somewhere at last
4. What kind of wedding did you have -big, small, Vegas?
Well about a 50 people,although I'm sure I did not recognize them all.
5. How did he/she propose?
That happened after the 3 bottle of red wine in a Italian restaurant.6. What did the in-laws think of you?
Got along with my father in law allright….praised my mother in law for her barbequed chicken.
Did allright!!!!
7. What are your household responsibilities?
We try to split this in a 50-50% deal…
8. Did you live together before marrying?
Nope
9. What were your decisions about children?
Waited 6 years than desided we wanted a boy and girl….this became reality.
10. How did you fall in love?
Not sure…..when it was,was rather surprised that she showed more interest in me beyond friendship.
However she was all smiles and most determend to keep me close….I had no objections. :D

11. What advice would you give to a couple that has decided to get married at a young age?
Don't do it……..close your eyes and start walking…..before comitting.

12. What's the hardest thing in your opinion about being married in today's society?
Expectation and experiences……..
Marriage should stand for a lifetime comitment,or atleast that's how it use to be.
Opinions have changed over the last 20 years or so…believe in eachother and have the will and trust to work towards a common goal……each day again."