August 13th, 2006, 08:57 AM
Wise words. I feel much the same way.
It's that longing that hits you when you have those free moments. I never feel that I've accomplished enough, and as soon as I finish something, I need so desperately to begin something else, like a clock is ticking in the background. Will it ever be enough? I suppose not. Complacency is the antithesis of creativity in many respects. I've never been complacent. Must we be troubled in order to be creative?
August 14th, 2006, 04:09 AM
Thank-god for these people
Not too wise, I have just spent too much time looking inward and trying to make sense of this being I am growing to be. I spend 90 percent of my day moving something on my body, for I can never truly stop and do nothing. Even as I fall asleep my toes at the end of the bed are still twitching. I have to be doing something, and if I am not I am ill. I think most of this is my ADHD problem, for I am always on the go. I can’t just sit still and do nothing. My mind is always thinking about the current project and my up and coming project. One of my college professors just gave a lecture for annoying her with a project that she will be giving us when the term begins in September. I am 3 weeks ahead of her. I was told to go back to my garden and watch my squash grow. There is also that artist in me, for they all say that artists are a bit crazy….we are to sensitive and too aware of our environment…yada…yada. My teachers tell me that I am one of their most unusual students, for my assignments are all done on time and with room to spare. I am the type of student that gets out a week or two early for summer vacation. I am driven past the point of reason. I sit up at night fearing that I won’t finish a project, or worrying about the next. When all is said and done, sleep comes and I sleep long and hard. There are several reasons for my driven personality, and the search for that next goal, for I can analyse it all with great in-depth. There is a reasonable explanation for all. One is my fear of being a failure, so I work harder to prove myself…this is caused by years of being called a failure by my own father. Yet, place that all aside, stop analysing and it all comes down to the journey and simple ness. There is a time to sleep, a time to play, to work and to sit still. Even when you’re still and listening to the ticking clock, your mind is working out things and readying you for your next journey. It’s not being troubled, it’s who you are. The surfer is always looking for that bigger and better wave…he is the thrill seeker living his life on every turn of the oceans hand. Yet here we are, writers and artists…we are the expressionists of the millennium for are we not the next C.S Lewis and the Pablo Pasco’s? People look upon them now as geniuses, and admire their work. Yet imagine what people thought of their work when it first came out. Think of how obsessed J.R Tolkien must have been to make up not only a different world but also a different language. Thank-god for these people really, for they taught us imagination, and how to see beyond what is right in front of us. I don’t know about you, but its people like them and like you that make the world a better place and a far more interesting place to be. Troubled…blah
Jen...sleeping on her computer keys