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Thread: At a Crossroad

  1. #1
    Any way the wind blows... Colossus's Avatar
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    At a Crossroad

    I am currently creating the plot outline for the story I am working on. The protagonist, a woman, has come to a crossroad and must make a decision on which way to turn. I have an idea which way she should turn but I want to get some input from others. So what I am looking for is which way you would turn and why? I welcome all input but would really like to hear from the women in the forum.

    Here’s the situation:

    Our protagonist, an Earth woman named Naria, was abducted over forty years ago to act as a guinea pig for neural “mind” tests. The tests were led by an alien man named Urbatrai. He suppressed her memories of Earth and introduced several separate persona’s which he could activate and deactivate at will. Naria’s persona’s were unaware of the tests and manipulations due to the neural modification. She is loyal to Urbatrai and respects him like a father. After forty years the tests are complete and Urbatrai requires millions of additional Earth subjects. However, he is unable to acquire them because another alien race, called the Sorex, has declared the sector of the galaxy Earth resides in as their own.

    Too make a long story short Urbatrai devises a plan and manipulates Naria and an alien named Kurn to retrieve the Earth subjects under the guise of actually helping them. Naria and Kurn fall deeply in love with each other.

    Here comes the zinger…as her love for Kurn grew her persona’s began to merge together. This caused great confusion for Naria. Eventually, she learns what has been done to her the past several decades. She now experiences deep love for Kurn and intense hatred for Urbatrai. She escapes a medical facility after recovering from being almost killed by Urbatrai. She discovers Earth is surrounded by the Sorex who are about to destroy all life on the planet. She also discovers Kurn has chased Urbatrai to his home planet where millions of Earth subjects have been taken.

    The decision she must make…Does Naria go to Earth, a home she is just rediscovering, and try to save everyone or does she go to aid Kurn, whom she loves deeply, kill Urbatrai, whom she hates intensely and want to kill him herself?

  2. #2
    The Great Flying Bear choppy's Avatar
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    Hi Colossus,

    Wow - what a predicament! Sorry I can't offer a female opinion, but here's some thoughts anyways.

    My first question would be, what could Naria hope to accomplish on earth? If she starts running around screaming "The aliens are coming! The aliens are coming!" it's most likely she would be locked up, isn't it?

    Secondly, characters are generally motivated by personal connections. It sounds like through the story you have concentrated on Naria's relationships with Kurn and Urbatrai. It would seem odd then that she would abondon this personal conflict to go and "save the world." This is unless of course she has some kind of personal connection to the duty of protection (i.e. maybe she's a soldier, peace officer, etc.). Or she may have some need to get out of that personal conflict with Kurn and Urbatrai. For example if you've ever known anyone who's been dating someone that's getting them mixed up in all sorts of thing they shouldn't be, sometimes the relationship is best to be dropped.

    Personally I would look at how you have motivated Naria so far, and what you could do with the story in either direction. There seems to be more potential for dramatic conflict if she goes after Kurn.

    Keep writing!

  3. #3
    Ancient Member Bardos's Avatar
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    I don't think there is a single right answer to your problem. The way I see it depends on her character.

    If Naria is an egoist (not with the negative sense of the word, neccessarily, but more centered on herself, is what I mean... and hope I make sense...), she will save Kurn and then kill Urbatrai ... or, at least, try to.

    If she is an altruist, perhaps she'll save Earth (or try to )


    Hope I helped.

  4. #4
    Witch of the Woods Miriamele's Avatar
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    If I were Naria I would go after Kurn, especially if I really loved him as you say she does. Don't underestimate the importance of love to a woman.

    But even if she didn't love him, what does she know of Earth? She doesn't even remember it, so why would she give up the only "family" she knows to try and save it, which is probably a hopeless idea anyway?

    So I think that you should have her go after Kurn, unless he doesn't deserve her love in some way. Did she just fall in love with him because her head is all messed up? You didn't really say if he's a good guy or not. Providing he is, she should follow him.

    Hope that helps.

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