Hmm... I don't really understand your logic here.... ESPECIALLY in light that this for all intensive purposes is a compare/contrast thread between MBOTF and Bakker's Second Apocalypse series.... Prince of Nothing and Aspect Emperor. I will be completely upfront that I LOVE MBOTF..... but I also really respect the work that Bakker has done. I find it interesting in the extreme that we are 100% diametrically opposed on our interpretations of the very things that you mention in your post.... unless you have not read Bakker's series..... in which case I would grant you a pass, but at the same time would state that to compare the series, you should have read both.
Allow me to use some of Bakker's Kellhusian logic IRT you overarching point about Malazan..... Your point seems to be..... Don't try Malazan because screwed up stuff happens to good characters that we care about and most people die............ Well.... sorry for the spoiler, but Malazan BOOK OF THE FALLEN isn't just because the Crippled God is the "Fallen One". It is precisely about all those that died ad well. Many deaths of great characters had a noble purpose... some did not.... basically..... life/death happens.
Bakker's Kellhus would essentially say that .... based on your logic.... that you should then go ahead and kill your self because evil people that have amassed power in life will remain powerful, bad stuff will happen to good people... and you will die eventually without your dreams being realized so why bother. Or, at the time that you refuse to kill yourself, he uses you in such a way that it is almost a social experiment to find out how far he can manipulate you into debasing yourself and turning your back on everything and anything that you held dear before finally snapping. We have cuckolding, fratricide, patricide statutory rape..... the list goes on in Bakker's story.
As a matter of fact, through all five books published so far..... there has yet to be a single good thing that has happened to anybody in the entire series. Honestly.... as grim as MBOTF is... it is like "It's a Wonderful Life" compared to PON. I would be more than happy to get into specifics, but I fear spoilers for the OP. I can say this..... there are many sacrifices for the greater good in Malazan.... where characters knowingly laid down their lives to achieve a purpose.... at this point in PON and then Aspect.... it is still a sick sadistic amoral bastard manipulating thousands regardless of the ruin he leaves of their lives.