Jonlaidlow gets my vote. It's just a fine story.
Bodhi gets a very well deserved runner-up not-real-vote. I thought both stories were good, but Jon's was more complete.
I can see the point of bringing in more blood, and I wear my 'amateur hobbyist' badge with pride. A lot of this is just style: I am interested in telling the same sorts of stories that Jon tells, and I think we have similar instincts in terms of how much to leave to the reader and in how to pace our stories. Naturally, I gravitate towards his stories. They have consistently been my favorites in the three months I've been participating in this contest. No one in this contest should have to cater towards my tastes, as it's not even clear that they're good tastes. But, it does get a bit incestuous.
At the end of the day, voting is just the incentive to participate. Winning is fun and getting votes feels good, but the commentary is really why we're here, I think. A real critique feels better than both. I apologize for not being as in depth as I normally would like to be, May has been a very busy month, as my last minute votes show.
Thanks to all who voted for my story. I hope to revisit that fantasy setting in the future.